If You've Got An Office Christmas Party, Here's Exactly What Not To Do To Make A Complete Fool Of Yourself!
Just promise us you'll lose it on the dancefloor, kay?
There are many struggles with the workplace. How can you spend as much time clicking your desktop, pretending to work, without actually doing anything? What really is the best excuse for coming in late? And - most importantly...
How do you actually survive the office Christmas party without making a fully fledged plonker out of yourself?
Sure, these tips won't give you the 'Employee of the Month' award anytime soon, but they will stop you from getting fired*.
*We cannot be held responsible for anyone who heeded these tips and still got fired. You must just suck at your job!
Dance Like Nobody's Watching You
When in reality, everyone will be watching you. Videos of you doing the robot to Carly Rae Jepsen will forever haunt every crevice of Facebook. But who cares? After all, if you're the sort of person who can hit the dancefloor and bust a move, your boss will see that as a great leadership trait... Even if the only thing you're leading is the conga line.
Fully Utilise The Mistletoe
When it comes to kissing coworkers, why wouldn't you do it? All it is is a friendly peck between two people who will awkwardly have to work next to each other for the next ten years. Everyone's a winner. And if anyone asks "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?", just tell them that it was a form of networking. Really, really, really personal networking.
Forget The Curfew And Early Start Tomorrow
Every manager likes to see their employees working very hard. So if - when it comes to the morning after the night before - you're yawning, there are bags under your eyes and you can barely lift your head up from the desk, it can only mean that you've been working so ferociously on updating the marketing presentation... And not because you stayed out 'til 6:39am this morning, with your shirt tied round your head pretending you're Rambo.
Most Importantly - Stay Near The Photocopier
You know what we're talking about. Use it to its fullest potential.