I Am Not Okay With This originally had a much darker ending for Sydney
27 February 2020, 16:35
The ending of the graphic novel is very different from the Netflix series – and it's much much darker. Readers of the copmic have called it "disturbing".
[CONTENT WARNING: This article may contain information and details that may be triggering or upsetting to certain people. Please read ahead with caution.]
Netflix's I Am Not Okay With This has already become a hit with fans on social media. Narrated by Sydney Novak (Sophia Lillis), the adaptation of Charles Forsman's graphic novel follows the teen as she tries to cope with her father's death, her feelings for her best friend and her new-found superpowers.
READ MORE: I Am Not Okay With This soundtrack: Every song from season 1
The show contains various easter eggs to The End of the F***ing World alongside a handful of classic John Hughes movie references. There's also several differences between the show and the original graphic novel.
One of those differences is how the whole thing ends. Sydney's ending in the book is completely different to what we see on screen. While the show's ending allows for more seasons, the book comes to a tragic and very abrupt end which some reviewers have labelled "irresponsible" and "disturbing".
WARNING: Spoilers ahead for the ending of I Am Not Okay With This. You've been warned.
If you've reached the final episode of the Netflix series, you'll know how it ends. After being confronted by Brad, who was about to read out all her secrets in her diary at the dance, Sydney's emotions get the better of her and she accidentally explodes Brad's head with her powers.
His body falls to floor with a pool of blood beneath him as the rest of the classmates scream in horror. Sydney then runs away from the school, avoiding the police and ends up at the top of a watch tower. The shadowy figure who has been following her around then approaches her. And that's it. Cliffhanger dot com.
In the graphic novel, however, it's quite different. And Sydney's ending is much much much darker than what we saw on screen.
The original graphic novel tells a much heavier tale of depression and trauma through Sydney and her father's story. At the end of the Charles Forsman's graphic novel, Sydney doesn't actually explode Brad's head, she explodes her own.
Instead of her father taking his own life like in the show, Sydney's dad asks her to kill him using her powers – and she does. After discovering her father crying and suffering from severe PTSD after the Iraq War, Sydney explains that he pleaded with her to make it stop. "I did it for him. I set him free," explains the novel version of Sydney.
In the end, Sydney is unable to cope. She doesn't tell anyone about her abilities (in the show, she confides in Stanley) and her anxiety manifests as a shadowy figure that follows her around (in the show, it's made into more of a physical being). At the end of the novel, Sydney explodes her own head.
Readers of the original graphic novel have said that the abrupt and "disturbing" ending is a lot to take in. One reviewer on GoodReads called it "irresponsible" to leave a teenager on such a dark note. Another called it a "terrible ending".
Thankfully, the TV series didn't go down that route. Sydney is alive at the end of the season, confiding in her friends and is on her way to figuring our how to control her powers. If Netflix picks the show up for a second season, we'll hopefully see a much more positive ending for Syd.