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The Capital Weekender With Ministry of Sound 10pm - 6am
Wasn't 2015 just PERFECT?! Well, it ALMOST was, if it wasn't for these few offenders! We would really appreciate it if these things didn't return this year, okay guys?!
Not naming anyone, here, but Kanye understand where we're coming from? Say "cheers" to your mum and your manager, and get over it. We don't need to know that the inspiration behind your next album is from your uncle's cousin's husband's teacher's mother's dog, okay?! (Picture: Getty)
How long have we been waiting for 'Anti'? Hasn't it been since like mid-2014?! We're not even being dramatic but we have LEGIT aged since she mentioned the album. Is it too much to ask for some more classic Rihanna BANGERS soon?! (Picture: Instagram)
Why you gotta play with our emotions like this, lads? One Direction are taking a break, and we're kinda counting down the seconds until it's over. NO! We're NOT crying, okay? You're crying! Shut it! (Picture: Getty)
Can you even blame us when you get snaps like this?! Look at it... JUST LOOK AT IT! The year of the nudity is 2016. Surely it can't be coincidence that 2016 sounds so much like 20-sexy, can it?! (Picture: Instagram)
Okay, while they're funny for a few seconds, but Enrique nearly getting all of his fingers chopped off by a drone? Madonna getting yanked off of a stage by her neck? Ain't nobody got time for that! (Picture: YouTube)
To be fair, he is called NAUGHTY Boy for a reason - not 'Kinda Well Mannered Boy'. But still, we don't want to log on to Twitter EVERY. SINGLE. DAY only to see him arguing with another star - from Louis to Noel Gallagher... AND EVEN ZAYN?! Naughty by name AND nature.
Okay, we did just say we didn't want to see celebs moaning on Twitter 24/7, but 23/6 wouldn't be bad! Zayn and Iggy are just a few of the stars who have had managers take Twitter away from them. Adele isn't allowed to Tweet in case she's had a few beers. Why would you take that from us?!
Louis, Louis, Louis. Don't be silly; wrap up your - ahem - singing career before having a baby! We were looking to 50 or so more years of 1D, but now you have to be a Dad?! Fine. We'll let you off this time, because it's going to be SO damn cute. (Picture: PA)
At least when Ed Sheeran got a tat of a lion on his chest, we knew what that meant... He likes lions. Duh. But what does Sam Smith's mean? We're getting that he's really into maths. That's it. We're done. (Picture: Instagram)
Don't get us wrong - it's cute. We like how one of our DJs is BFFs with the world's biggest star, but... IT HAS TO END ALREADY! Why? Because we're just SO jealous. And just try telling us you're not. We dare you.
"Oh. It's a mum announcing her daughter got into college by singing 'Hotline Bling', is it? And here's a bunch of OAPS trying to mouth The Weeknd? Erm... We suppose that's okay. Who are we kidding? Let's just watch cat videos. They're a lot less cringe!" (Image: YouTube)
Face the facts, people! Bruno Mars is NOT going to release new music until his collab with Mark Ronson comes to an end. Don't get us wrong - it was a TUUUUUNE, but imagine how good his next one will be? (And in 2017, we'll be asking for the end of covers of that too!)
She released an album called 'Artpop'. Not 'Artjazz'. Not 'Artblues'. Nope. And we want her to go back to pop, already! And we reckon Tony Bennett does too - like, can you imagine his little face as he saw THAT meat dress?! (Picture: Getty)